Something's Different

Something clicked in me today. I realized that I've once again recreated my body. I'd done it once before in 2003-2004 without consciously trying. This time was different though. This time I've worked hard at it. I've altered my way of eating and my daily food choices. I've exercised like a mad woman, almost every single day for six months. This truly is a new way of life for me. I look forward to challenging myself physically, can't wait for Dallas' Happy Hour each week, love to find new hikes to explore, and while I can't say I exactly love running yet, I AM running – 25 minutes at a time so far, and have entered my first 5K. These are big changes.

So, as I thought about Thanksgiving, and Christmas, coming up, I thought about whether I would gain weight or not. And I suddenly realized: it didn't really matter if I gained a pound or two this weekend. What???? Is this the obsessive constantly on the scale, tracking every possible variable number girl? Yes it is. Since I hurt my leg at the end of September I haven't been tracking my food intake or exercise. Why?

On the Food: I KNOW how to eat now; choose low or no fat over regular fat, keep portions small (deck of cards, deck of cards runs through my head when I occasionally run across a barbequed steak on my counter), load up on veggies and salads (my dinner plate is ALWAYS at least half veggies and salad). I love my morning smoothies and even tho I got sidetracked by grilled cheese sandwiches this past month (made with PAM or I Can't Believe it's Not Butter spray, and often with mushrooms and spinach), I have reverted back to the smoothies – by choice, not because I have to.

On the Activity Level: I LOVE being active again, feeling my body move and do things it couldn't do a month or a week ago, lifting heavier weights, actually running (okay, jogging, but in my mind it counts as running), being able to sprint up stairs, feeling light in my steps. That had changed for me at one point; I stopped doing anything active for I can't remember exactly how long, but I know it was a long time. I never ever want to revisit how I felt then. The best I could do was get up to work, the rest of the time I pretty much stayed in bed or sat at the computer. Mind you, I still spend probably too much time on the computer, but the point is I now balance it out with being active almost every single day.

So, as I head into Thanksgiving weekend, I'm not scared about eating too much. I'm sure I'll have some of all my favorites, and probably some mayo on that turkey sandwich, and even if I gain a pound or two, I know that it won't be permanent. It would take a whole lot of work and determination to put back all these pounds and inches I've lost, and I'm just not motivated in that direction, ya know?

Also as I head into this weekend, I feel profoundly grateful for all the blessings in my life; my three wonderful, independent, loving children, my friends, my work, my home, the ability to go to the beach, my health, and my online friends who have motivated, inspired and supported me in quitting smoking and getting healthy through eating right and exercising. I hope you all also appreciate what you have and enjoy the coming holidays in good health.
-aloha